About ConflictPause
Building gentler tools for navigating heated conversations.
Our mission
We often hurt the people we love—not because we want to, but because we respond from the tumult of emotion instead of taking a step back.
Arguments escalate fast. Tone sharpens. Bodies go into fight/flight. We say things we don’t fully mean—and repairs get harder each time. Most couples don’t need a lecture; they need a way to pause that both people can accept in the moment.
Why pauses?
We built ConflictPause because we have been there—wanting to stay kind and calm, and still getting swept up. I’m a software engineer who believes small, well-designed tools can change behavior. I wanted a gentle, shared way to say “not now, but we will come back to this”—without stonewalling, without disappearing, without guessing what to do next.
What ConflictPause does
- Create space: a shared, respectful pause—one tap, one script.
- Reset the body: a 90-second breathing rhythm that grounds both of you.
- Repair sooner: a simple check-in and tiny plan to re-enter the conversation.
Our principles
We drew on co-regulation (calming bodies before words) and best-practice time-outs (name the pause, set a return time, repair gently). We’ll publish our evidence notes as the product evolves.
- Care over victory. The relationship wins when nobody “wins” the fight.
- Pause ≠ stonewalling. A pause includes time, plan, and return.
- Bodies first. Nervous systems calm before minds make sense.
- Repair is the ritual. Every pause ends with a small reconnection.
What ConflictPause is not
- Not therapy, and not a replacement for it.
- Not a place to hide from hard topics.
- Not surveillance; we don’t sell data, and your pause is yours.
Who it’s for
- Couples who want fewer blow-ups and faster repair.
- People who value kindness + clarity more than being right.
- Anyone who wants a script when words are hard.
What’s next
We built ConflictPause because we have been there—wanting to stay kind and calm, and still getting swept up. I’m a software engineer who believes small, well-designed tools can change behavior. I wanted a gentle, shared way to say ‘not now, but we will come back to this’—without stonewalling, without disappearing, without guessing what to do next.